Moved...

Sorry it's been a few weeks since my last post but it's been rather busy! The worst aspect is that my Unwired broadband service is failing to pick up a signal and so I have no internet at home!

But the move went well which I was very relieved about. My gorgeous guy McBrad of course helped me immensely - on the Friday before the move, he helped me paint my apartment which was a big thing for him...thus far in his life, he's managed to avoid having to paint by simply employing other people to do it for him. So I regard it as a mark of his love for me that he cast aside his aversion to manual labour and did a marvellous job of it!!! My friends Mack, Andy, Jacqui and Dan, as well as McBrad's friend Ted all helped on the day and although it took much much longer than we expected, we did accomplish it all. It has taken me a few big days/nights since then getting the apartment all sorted out, but it's mostly done now! I've still got all my books in boxes, however tomorrow I'm going to buy a couple of bookcases and that will the last thing! I will post some pictures soon, but that will have to wait until I've got myself a new internet account with a fixed line operator. So it's all very exciting. I do love just coming home after work to MY apartment...how good is that! And I'm getting up earlier each morning and actually having breakfast for the first time in several years! And my personal trainer Daz weighed me last night (after a two week absense from gym) and I've LOST 1.5 kgs (or 3.3 pounds) since we got back from holidays so I was very excited by that!

But the best thing has been my new bed. With the move being a little bit more extended than I had originally planned, I ended up staying at McBrad's for a few days. But with my new fridge and bed delivered, and me finally in the apartment, we got to break in my gorgeous new sheets, on my very comfortable new mattress on my very stylish new bed in my lovely new aparment. Nothing like a good ol' shag on new stuff! :-)

So now, it's a matter of getting used to living there, paying off a mortgage, catching a different bus to work, and adapting to my new local supermarket. And being only 8 minutes drive from McBrad's!!! It's all good!!!

Sleeping in...

I love sleeping in. There's absolutely no question that it is my utterly favourite thing to do on a weekend! And when it's a long weekend, well, it just means twice as many opportunities to sleep in. Today, however, I was determined to get up at the unheard of hour of 9am! I even set my alarm to wake me at 8.35am to ensure that it happened. 8.35am came and on switched ABC Classic FM. And what did I do? I vaguely woke up, had a stretch in bed, and revelling in the delicious feeling of being under blankets on a cool'ish morning, rolled over and snoozed! 9am came, the news came on and I popped my head out from underneath the covers. 9.05am and the news over, I once again submerged. Didn't end up dragging myself out of bed until 10.30am! I am just hopelessly addicted to those long drawn out mornings in bed!

And it's been a lovely morning I must say. Walked down to the Grumpy Baker and had my morning long black with a ham and cheese croissant whilst reading the Saturday paper. (and if you remember reading my Easter post from last year, you'll understand how delightful it is to finally have found a place that serves H&C croissants over Easter). I've come back from that, finished my paper, caught up on a couple of blogs, and an email from The Tourist.

I'm just about to depart for a 2pm coffee with a nice man I've been chatting to on Gaydar. We'll see how it goes. I mentioned a couple of posts ago that I've been pretty quiet on the ol' online front this year, my time being occupied rather exclusively firstly with Mack and then The Tourist. Well, now that they're both in different continents, I've got back into the online thing, albeit not as exuberantly as I was last year.

And so, I had a couple of drinks with a lovely Englishman on Tuesday night, who, quite conveniently turned up on Friday night at the same pub I was at with my mate Dan. (OK, OK, I may possibly have let slip in an sms where I'd be) We're also doing dinner tonight so all seems good on that front. But I'm not sure about him...he seems very nice, he's handsome, charming, chatty and all that...but since The Tourist, my standards seem to have been raised somewhat! Surprising, given that it was just a 3 week holiday affair, but there was so much good stuff with TT, that I find myself looking for equivalent or better in every other guy now! Anyway, I'm giving this new Englishman the benefit of the doubt and we'll see how we go on date no. 3.

I've got to say, this weekend is highly unplanned...I've been just taking things as they come. I've actually started studying for my Diploma of Financial Planning - well, I haven't started studying, that is the problem. My first assigment is due 11th April and I've not even opened the book! So I think I will have to actually do some studying this weekend! UG!

Anyway, this is a bit of a rambling post...not a lot important stuff to report really!

Hope everyone else is having a great one! :-)

Monty's Miscellaneous Musings...

It's amazing how effective I find blogging for getting things off my chest. I had my rant in January but once I had posted, I just felt better. I got back to feeling normal; I'm having fun; I'm revelling in my singleness, my health, my fabulous new job, my overall situation in life. Yes, I haven't found Mr Right, but I've got plenty of good things happening at the moment.

Last week, I was quite sad when I said goodbye to Mack, but y'know, once I'd written about it, I felt better. It was a lovely few weeks but that's all it's been. He's not the love of my life; I've not just finished a long term relationship. And so, I'm not moping around devastated...in fact, I have just had a great (if somewhat exhausting) weekend. It just seems that putting digit to QWERTY helps me sort things out in my own mind...helps me get some perspective - and your comments certainly help.


But back to the weekend...it all started on Valentine's Day (Thursday). I had arranged to go to dinner with a couple of friends however they had to pull out at last minute. It had been quite a full on week and I really felt like just going out for a drink. Jacqui, my friend at work, is newly single and was in need of some cheering up. And we pursuaded one of the Risk Executives attached to my new team, John, to join us. John is gay too, and is quite cute, about my age, and we've been conducting a very mild flirtation over the last couple of weeks. But Thursday night, things certainly ramped up a notch or two. We went out to Ivy Bar, intending to have a couple of drinks. But Ivy, being the latest bar opened in Sydney, is full of good looking men - unfortunately they seem mostly straight. And so, with such a cornucopia of visual delights, we just had to stay and have another drink or two. A few bottles down, I feel lips on my neck! John's lips to be specific. And before you know it, John and I were snogging like there was no tomorrow! And I must say, he's a fabulous kisser! That's as far as it went - but that was a pretty major step for me, snogging a guy (an Exec from work mind you) in the middle of a straight bar only a block or so away from my office! Typical Monty thing really...just your ordinary Valentine's Day kiss is just not enough - I've gotta go to the extreme!

A bit of a crazy night, but the next day, things were fine, and he actually messaged me over the weekend wanting to see if we could go out one night. So you just never know! The crazy thing is, it was last February when I hooked up with the Cute Gay Work Guy from my old team...so it seems like February, Monty and work are one hell of a combination!!!

Friday night, we had a work dinner with my old team - we were the top team in NSW last half and so my old Executive Manager took the entire team out for dinner. It was a great dinner, nice to spend time with my old team but once the party broke up about 11pm, I was in the mood for celebrating some more. (the fact that we'd been paid our bonuses from last half the day before may have contributed somewhat to my exuberance) So I grabbed a cab to Oxford St, walked into Stonewall, walked straight to the bathroom (I really needed to pee), came out, walked past this really cute guy standing at the bar, he smiled at me, I smiled back and that was it. Monty's fastest ever pick up! Turns out he's an Anglo-Irish tourist, here for the Mardi Gras festival. I ended up spending the night at his hotel. The next day (Saturday), I did a bit of a tourist's guide to the main sights of Sydney with him and I found him to be a lovely guy! With a wicked smile, the gift of the gab and the Irish charm. I had already organized to have my mate Dan over for a dinner and dvd night and The Tourist had bought himself a ticket to the Pool Party so we went our separate ways late in the afternoon.

Sunday, it was Fair Day and after a coffee and croissant, I toddled on down around 2:30pm. Caught up with Evan, briefly saw McDreamy (he was on duty at the Medical tent), ran into Mike and Bondi, said hello to Simon, and then met up with The Tourist. We spent the rest of the afternoon together. I brought him home last night for a quiet night in...home delivered Italian food and TV. Just what I needed. I was thoroughly smashed.

We caught the bus into town this morning and I went to work, he back to his hotel. He flies up to Cairns and Port Douglas tomorrow and will be back in 10 days, in time for Mardi Gras. I was totally knackered at work today, not really having got much sleep, but I've gotta say, it's been one HUGE weekend!

Weekend...and Mack...

We went down to the beach house over the weekend - we being myself, Evan, DG and NSSG. It was the first time DG and NSSG had come to the beach house and so I was hoping that it would be a perfect weekend. Unfortunately, La Nina had other ideas and so it was raining all Friday and Saturday which meant that 4 guys had to hang out inside! We certainly kept ourselves entertained, with papers to read, Trivia to Pursue, DVD's to watch and food and alcohol to consume (and Jenga to challenge us late at night, after a few drinks). So we managed!

But Sunday dawned bright and sparkly which excited me no end! So, after a relaxing breakfast cooked by DG and NSSG, Evan and I indulged in a spot of gardening and thence to the beach! Evan, sensible man that he is, went for a walk, wearing long sleeves. Me, on the other hand, saw the hot surfer dude in the surf and planted myself on the sand in easy viewing distance, ditched the shirt and clad only in my Aussiebums, proceeded to read my book. Not that much reading was done, as the surfer inched closer up the beach toward me. Eye candy plus plus plus! He was HOT!

Time forgotten, Monty lost in pleasant thoughts of surfer dude in the dunes. 90 minutes later, he picked up his board and left and I awoke from my reverie. Unfortunately, with no sunscreen on, my lily whites became ruby red!!! OUCH! 'twas a Monty in pain that drove home Sunday night!

But, I was at home Sunday night, reviewing the pics on my camera and as I went back through them, the previous pictures I had taken came up on the screen. Pictures of Mack. And it all came rushing back...the feelings! I had deliberately not thought about him (not an easy task) since our breakup, but seeing him again on my camera just brought him back to the front of my mind. And I sighed... It's amazing how you remember every detail of what was happening, what was said, when looking at a photo.

I had actually organized to meet up with him last night (Monday) - we originally planned to go (and had book tix) to the OpenAir Cinema a few weeks ago when we were dating and so we thought, seeing as how he leaves this week, that this would be a good opportunity to say goodbye, as friends. Turned up yesterday at Mrs Macquaries Chair, where the cinema is, and saw him coming toward me, through the crowd. God, he's so cute, and gorgeous, and tall. We were there about 90 minutes early and so we grabbed some food, a glass of wine and chatted whilst viewing the sun set behind the Opera House. It was a delightful balmy night and it felt just so relaxed to be chatting to him. The movie started after sun-down, which was about 8.30 or so and there was a bit of a chill in the air. I foolishly had only worn jeans and a thin shirt, due to my rather painful sunburnt back. But as the movie progressed, I did start to get just a little bit chilly. He noticed and took off his jacket and gave it to me. What a gentleman! I gratefully accepted it as I was really starting to feel the chill, but then, when I had it on, I could smell him. Oh, what a rush of memories that gave me. I loved snuggling with him and lying in the crook of his arm, with my head on the top part of where his chest becomes his shoulder was the best, as it allowed me to breathe his scent in all night long. So the last part of the movie was lost in a daze of fond recollections.

I drove him home and we had a bit of a snog...but it wasn't a sexual thing, it was just sweet, gentle kisses, mixed with a touch of sadness. I'm not going to see him again, well, for at least a year or so anyway. And so it was a bit emotional for both of us. It's hard, when you find someone that you think had all the potential of being "the one", letting him leave your life. Even for a just a year. Who knows what will happen in the next twelve months. But one thing I know, we'll remain friends, and we'll both have a very special, very lovely few weeks of shared memories to look back on. Monty is a bit melancholy today.

All good things must come to an end...

Yes, it's over. This thing with Mack that is. We had a chat about it last night and with his departure less than 10 days away, it's all started to hit him. He told me that he's becoming too attached to me and with him having one farewell party after another, he's struggling to cope emotionally. Naturally, I would have preferred that "we" kept going right up until he left, but I can understand where he was coming from. Even when we were talking about it, I could see that he was becoming emotional and the last thing either of us wanted was for this "relationship" to be anything but enjoyable. I don't want to put additional pressure on him and as much as I would love to see more of him, it's just not fair...on either of us. Even in the 24 hours since we've talked, already I'm missing him. The chemistry that we had between us was amazing; I found him unbelievably attractive and he told me that he was totally into me. We enjoyed each other's company, had lots of laughs and have become friends, even in the short time that we've known each other. It's been an intense few weeks and I don't regret any of it. He's a top guy and we've agreed to keep in contact via email while he is overseas. It is ironic that I find someone who I think has all the hallmarks of being "the one" AND who reciprocates my feelings, and he's moving overseas.

Oh well, all good things must come to an end. ...sigh...

So, it's back on the dating treadmill for Monty! As much as I don't feel like it at the moment. I really feel like going home and watching sappy movies and eating icecream all weekend, but that won't get me anywhere!

On another note, I had another appointment with my personal trainer Greg on Wednesday. Apparently, I also have very good posture and technique, which is somewhat attributable to my core strength...or something. We worked mainly on my upper body this time which felt good at the time. BUT I had to sign some papers at the end of my session and could barely lift the pen! I've signed up to see him twice a week for an hour a time - every Monday and Wednesday afternoons! Eek! I fear I will just be in pain 24/7 for the next month or so until I get used to this!

The good thing on Wednesday was that I could walk the bridge home without any difficulty; my legs were fine though Jacqui walked home with me (she lives around the corner) and so I couldn't power my way as I would like to. I had to moderate my pace for her. But it was a lovely walk home again. But today, my arms are aching!!! My arms AND my heart! Monty's a bit miserable today...

Life's Unexpected Twists...

OK, so apparently my core strength is quite good for someone who's not exercised for the past decade. On Thursday at my appointment with my Personal Trainer Greg, he put me through a series of exercises that was designed to check out my core strength. He seemed quite impressed. Then again, he may say that to all of his new clients...just to butter them up. I walked home again, but this time, my legs were so sore that every step was agony. I could barely lift one foot in front of the other. Halfway across the Harbour Bridge, I was seriously contemplating getting to Milsons Point and jumping on the train; I just didn't think I'd be able to make it all the way home. But, I decided that if I'm going to be serious about exercising, then I would need to just work my way through the pain, not give up. And so I persisted and made it all the way home.

There was added incentive in walking home, I must admit. Because, at Waverton station waiting for me, was a guy. I was talking about it to Muzbot on Saturday at his birthday pub crawl, about how very ironic it was that when I had my rant a couple of weeks ago, the pieces were already starting to fall into place in relation to this guy. Let me go back to the start...

We met in very classic circumstances...it was late December, we'd both been to our respective work Christmas parties and had left them. We were both a little bit pissed (well, actually, thinking back we were probably both quite a bit pissed) and both ended up at the Columbian Hotel on Oxford St. I'm not a huge fan of the Columbian so normally wouldn't have gone there, however I was meeting my lovely friend SG there - hadn't seen him for a few weeks. Anyway, I went to the bar to order a drink; crowded bar, so I was kinda right next to this tall guy. Didn't really take much notice of him, I was more intent on getting the attention of the bartender. But he obviously took notice of me...he commented on the fact that I looked rather pleased with the world. And it's true, I often find myself grinning inwardly (and obviously outwardly too) when I go to a gay bar...it's still a new enough experience for me to find the thrill in it. Anyway, this guy had a smashing smile himself...I just melted. So, the upshot of it was that I took him home that night. When we awoke the next day, we actually talked to each other and I found him to be a lovely guy. Originally from country NSW, professionally employed, living in Bondi, 29 yrs old. A really nice honest kinda guy. We exchanged numbers when I dropped him home, but you know, I wasn't really expecting anything to come of it. I've been there enough times to know that! We had one more conversation, a couple of days later and in it, he told me that he was actually moving to Canada in February, for a 12 month working holiday. Doh! And so I figured that was it...no point in pursuing anything with him.

Christmas came and I went down the coast; he went home to see his family and was going to spend a couple of weeks relaxing up there. I messaged him Christmas Day and NYE, to which he responded quite positively. I went back to work and got on with life...and in the process had my little rant. The day after Rant part II, I was working back late at the office. He (his name is Mack by the way) messaged me to see if I was still in the city...would I like to catch up for a quick drink? You betcha baby!!!

We met up at Martin Place Bar and when I saw him again, that gorgeous smile was still there. I couldn't resist...I ended up taking him home again. But still, I was questioning myself...what was the purpose of seeing more of him when there was such a limited time frame? We ended up discussing it that night at home, snuggled on the couch. He admitted that he was really attracted to me and couldn't believe his bad luck in meeting me with only 6 weeks to go before leaving. My sentiments entirely. But it was good to talk about it, to get things out in the open. We ended up deciding that yes, we both like each other...a lot! But there had to be an end...namely, his departure. So, for want of a better description, we decided that we would have ourselves a "holiday romance". And so, since then, we've been dating. We've been to the movies, we've been to dinner, he's stayed in at my place, watching DVD's and eating leftovers for dinner, I've stayed at his place. I've met a few of his friends, he's met a few of mine.

And so, I find myself in a strange situation. If Mack was not leaving, I know that there's a good chance I would find myself falling in love. As it stands, I'm not letting myself go there. I am thoroughly enjoying being with him. He's a joy to be around...his sunny smile lights up the room (well, for me anyway) and his open honesty is refreshing. I love snuggling into his hairy chest (of course); he tells me that he loves me going to sleep in his arms. It aint perfect - after all, it all finishes soon. But until then, I'm one happy chap! As the saying goes, it's always darkest just before you turn on the light...and trust me, the after my little dark ranting period, it's nice to have some light!