Eating badly...

...but enjoying it! Regular readers of my blog will know that I have a slim build - I've regarded it as a curse all of my life but of recent years, it has become somewhat of a blessing. Only about 2 years ago, I finally achieved what I had strived for all my adult life...a 30 inch waist! You have no idea how exciting that was for me...finally able to buy jeans, shorts, trousers and suits off the rack, without the need for alterations, with plenty of choice as well! And about 18 months ago, I finally hit my minimum weight for height! Another exciting milestone in my skinny life! I think that my lightning fast metabolism is finally starting to slow down to just be really fast instead and so as a consequence, I've actually been able to put on some weight instead of burning it off like I've always done.

I know this is probably sounding like everyone's dream "problem" - the inability to put on weight, but I've hated being skinny all my life and would still prefer to be a bit more built. But I have long resigned myself to having a slim build and the more guys I meet, the more I appreciate it. So many guys are regular gym bunnies, watching what they eat, jogging every week etc and I just meander through life, eating whatever I like and doing very little meaningful exercise.

And this week has been a perfect example of my bad eating habits...Monday night, I cooked myself a delicious spag bol and of course, piled it high with parmesan cheese, topped off with a glass of lovely 2004 Barossa Shiraz. Tuesday night, ahhhh Tuesday night...was the night I spent with the lovely Bruce and we had pizza for dinner (OK, it was gourmet pizza but it was still covered in yoghurt and cheese and stuff). Last night, Bruce came over to my place for dinner and as I had lots of leftover spag bol sauce, I just whipped up some more pasta and we consumed that, again augmented with a glass (or two) of wine. Tonight, I'm going home and making one of my favourite quick and easy dinners...parmesan pasta. Basically, you melt a tablespoon of butter, throw in a small carton of double cream, bring it almost to the boil, add a handful of grated parmesan cheese, some chopped up parsley, salt and pepper to taste and that's it...it's fundamentally heart attack pasta....and my goodness, it's magnificent! Mama mia! And with a nice oaky chardonnay...perfetto! So it's been pizza and pasta all week so far!

So as you can see, counting calories is not my forte! Wouldn't know a calorie if I fell over it! They just do not figure in my life!

But, speaking of the lovely Bruce (I'm sure we were), last night was another highly pleasant evening. He hadn't intended coming over...he rang me after work for our usual daily chat and had told me he planned to stay home and catch up on some work. I simply suggested he come over for some spag bol (not thinking he would) and he capitulated without the slightest attempt of resistance! This was very unexpected and so I tore around the apartment cleaning up (which certainly burned some of the aforesaid calories I'm sure), had a quick shower, threw on some shorts and a t-shirt, just in time for his arrival. And it was another relaxing evening spent chatting, eating, drinking, watching my favourite show, Spicks and Specs, and a little bit of snogging....he is such a good kisser!!!!!! Unfortunately, he had an early morning appointment so he didn't stay over...sigh...

But, I'll be seeing him tomorrow night AND staying over at his place for our first ever sleep-in on Saturday morning...all our previous sleepovers have been on a school night and so we've been getting up at 6am so that we can both make it to work in time. So I am really looking forward to a semi-lazy sleep-in with the very hot and exceptionally sexy Bruce!

Over the moon...

As you may have seen in Muzbot's blog, last night was a full lunar eclipse which made it a blood moon as well. What a night...

I collected Bruce from his place and we drove over to South Head about 7.30pm. The moon was already well and truly eclipsing at that stage, which was pretty freaky but also really cool. I had a bottle of champers as well and so we found ourselves a dark little spot on the lawn on the cliff's edge, put down the picnic blanket and sat there and sipped our champers! The weather was delightful - I was just wearing jeans and a shirt and felt comfortable. I did end up putting my jacket on later in the evening (as did Bruce) but for an August night, it was extemely balmy. We sat there and chatted for a couple of hours and watched the moon get progressively darker and redder (though, I would call it more ochre than red). And it was a great conversation - we really started getting into some very personal stuff which was great - and we relaxed into each other so that by the end, we were just sitting there, holding hands, my head on his shoulder.

We went back to his place after that, ordered a pizza and consumed that very quickly and then at about 10pm, went to bed. We kept talking in the dark - it's funny how being in the dark allows you to say stuff you can't say normally - and the more I talk to him, the more I respect him and admire him. And, for the first time, I fell asleep in his arms...very literally in his arms. I cannot describe how good it felt when I woke sometime through the night and I was still in his arms...and then I just drifted off again...

The more I see of him, the more I like him...and I have no doubt that there is going to be some challenging stuff ahead for both of us. He's been badly scarred by his previous 11 yr relationship - by the emotional crap that he went through in the relationship and the acrimonious break up as well - and it's bound to raise its head at some stage. I know he doesn't feel like he's able to give me the level of emotional commitment that he feels I need, but for me, I am just so so so enjoying this that I'm pretty happy with how things are going! It will be a slow process, there's no doubt, but I really don't mind...I think he's just a terrific guy, with a beautiful heart and so I'm prepared to put in the hard yards.

You've Got Mail...

I found myself unexpectedly at home this evening (Saturday). And so, thought it would be a good opportunity to catch up on some DVD's and bad take-away food. So I toddled off to the video store (why do we still call it a Video store when it doesn't actually have videos?) and rented myself a couple of DVD's, purchased a tub of chocolate icecream, and then drove to KFC and got myself a really unhealthy serve of fried chicken and the delicious KFC chips and came back home! It was going to be the perfect night in!

As it turned out, I flicked on the TV and an ad for the night's movie was on..."You've Got Mail" starring Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. I saw this movie when it came out - I think it must've been 1998/99 - and I loved it at the time. It was at the time when email was really becoming entrenched in life and the internet was passing from that interesting but useless phase into a quite handy tool to have. And that movie opened my mind the world of internet dating! It's your very typical Hollywood romantic comedy, but I still thought it was awesome. I actually went out and bought the soundtrack to remind me of the movie!

But I haven't seen it since, and so when I saw it advertised tonight, I thought, hang the DVD's - I'll watch the TV movie! It's soooo perfect, the way everything works out - and of course, it only ever happens like that in the movie. But I've talked to so many guys who keep saying that you'll never find love over the 'net, only sex. But, to be honest, I would like to believe that love can be found on the 'net, just as it can be found across a crowded nightclub, or in a pub, or at a friend's dinner party - it's just one of the tools that you use to meet guys. It's happened for my lovely friend Evan - he met McDreamy via Gaydar. In fact, I was having dinner with him on Thursday night and he told me how much he loved McDreamy. This is nothing new to me, he tells me that all the time. I had lunch with McDreamy today and you know what, he told me how much he loves Evan. This is also nothing new to me. These two guys have met and have clicked and it's fantastic to see their relationship grow and develop. I am constantly telling them that they give me hope that I too will be able to find a guy that I can love, and that will love me back. And watching the movie tonight, well, it was lovely! A fairytale - yes - but still, I would like to believe that it is possible! Naive - perhaps - but hey, I'm a hopeless romantic!

And so, I'll persist with Gaydar for the time being. At the moment, I'm not doing a lot with it, as I'm rather taken with Bruce, and who knows what will happen. I'm trying to be sensible about it, taking it one day at a time - don't want to run too far ahead of myself. But, I'm open to all possibilities with him so we'll see how it goes. He's away this weekend as well, and it's killing me! I can't wait to see him again. What's worse, he's out of mobile range, so I can't even talk or text him! Arghhhh! So, bring on the end of the weekend, when I can at least talk to him again, or better still, see him! I must say, it's wreaking havoc with my work - I'm tired all the time as I don't really sleep that much when I'm with him and I am easily distracted by his emails and texts.

Anyway, it's now 1:10am Sunday morning and my bed (and all the lovely new linen) is calling me. I do hope everyone else is having themselves a great weekend!

Falling...

I received an email this morning from Bruce..."I really enjoyed your company last night and waking up beside you this morning." Now this may not seem like a particularly exciting or romantic statement, but he's not one who overflows with protestations of love! So, when I received the email this morning, I melted!

He's intent on dating me the old-fashioned way...to get to know me as a person, rather than just get caught up in the physical side of things. This may surprise many of you, but we haven't actually shagged yet. We've spent 4 of the past 7 nights together however we have just slept (as in the actual act of closing ones eyes) together on these occasions. This has been difficult, as you could imagine, because I am deeply attracted to him and the physical contact in bed certainly produces quite obvious results. But, I've actually started enjoying the fact that he wants to focus on our fledgling friendship/relationship instead of just doing the usual thing and shagging first, asking questions later. I like cuddling him while we chat on the couch, I like snuggling with him in bed...but I really like the fact that he rings me each day just to have a chat, even if we are seeing each other that night. This is a gentleman that I could seriously fall for...

Bruce...

Well, he's hot as, a very sweet man, and when I mentioned that I blog and that I needed a nom de plume for him, he requested BRUCE! So, Bruce it is.

He was away for the weekend, which made it drag somewhat...thankfully, I had my shopping expedition on Saturday, Single Guy's birthday party on Saturday night, and Sunday martini's with my mate Muzbot to keep me occupied. But, I staggered home at 7.30pm Sunday and he sent me a message..."I'm on my way over". Bliss! It was soooo lovely to see him again - we just sat on the couch, consumed a bottle of Shiraz Viognier and chatted for a couple of hours. I then suggested he view my new bedroom linen and so he did...and it passed muster with him! yay!

Needless to say, I was a little tired on Monday, but I was one happy little vegemite! He was even more tired, but he invited me to dinner at his place and so I toddled on over last night and spent a very relaxing and really domestic evening with him. And then he coughed up with the "Bruce" comment. OK, it's not my favourite name, but thankfully, it's not his real name. I actually really really like his name, it suits him perfectly.

Tonight, I'm going home and sleeping - having had very little sleep over the past two nights! He is similarly shattered! But we have a dinner date tomorrow night which is very exciting!

I can't believe how much I'm gushing over him actually...I emailed my lovely friend Evan on Monday and the whole flipping email was about how wonderful "Bruce" was, how sweet he is, how HOT he is, blah blah blah, but I could not help myself! This is really not good...I need to get a handle on myself and control my emotions. . . it's just so damn difficult! ...sigh...

Needless to say, all other dates have been cancelled! Monty is smitten!

Up Up and Away...

Well, I'm rather excited! Booked my flight to the UK and for the first time, I'm flying with Virgin Atlantic! I've been a faithful Singapore Airlines flyer as I do love the service and their inflight entertainment. BUT I've been assured by my friend Tom (himself a faithful Virgin flyer) that Virgin will meet my very strict standards! AND as he introduced me to the Virgin Frequent Flyer program, he gets points whenever I fly...hmmmm, methinks there may have been a vested interest somewhere here! Anyway, I'm excited! I depart our fair shores 4th October and hit London 5th October! I leave London 8th November and arrive back in the Antipodes on the 10th. So I have just over 5 weeks. Yay! I'm planning on seeing a lot of London this time (thanks to my long suffering brother Mark, who is providing the free accommodation) as well as possibly a bit of the Nth of England, Paris, and Sweden. Mmmmmm, Swedish boys. . . It's all rather unplanned at the moment, quite unlike me, but I'm enjoying the relative freedom and the endless possibilities that not locking myself into a schedule brings. So we'll see what life (and London) brings me!

Yesterday, I woke up feeling like I needed a change. So what did I do? Went to my favourite store, David Jones', and bought myself a new mattress protector, valance, quilt, quilt cover, pillows, cushions - the whole kit and caboodle! Looks fabulous! My bedroom is transformed! It's amazing what a difference it makes! So that is also another exciting thing! (not quite up on the same excitement level as overseas travel, but still)

Today, it's a cold and rainy day in the Emerald City. I have on some baroque CD's, my heater is pumping out the warmth, and I'm just about to get me some lunch. Think I shall spend the arvo inside, reading the Sunday papers, maybe a beer or two if I'm in the mood, and wait for my Wednesday guy to return from his weekend away! He does actually have a name, but it won't be revealed until after the second date! Watch this space!

It's early days...

...but Wednesday's date was sensational (and the guy wasn't half bad either)!!! AND he seems to be as much into me, as I am into him! Unfortunately, he'd already organized to go away this weekend, otherwise the rest of the dates would have been summarily cancelled and the time devoted to him.

Well, maybe not all - after all, you can't put all your eggs into one basket. But seriously, I'm blown away! And from our subsequent telephone conversations and text messages, he's just as enthusiastic! I feel like I shouldn't even blog about this as it'll curse any chance of it actually ever happening.

Hope you have a great weekend everyone!